Why I'm done blogging (for a while, anyway)

I have been formulating this post in my head for a few months now, but I just could not make up my mind.  I finally decided this week, and even then, M pointed out other sides of it.  Alas, I am done blogging, and here is why:

Reason #3: 
I don't know who reads this!  I typically share links to blog posts on Facebook, and some posts get more attention than others of course.  But I don't actually know who reads this.  Our parents, I think?  Not even sure if both of our siblings do.  One of my BFFs?  Everyone is so busy, and I don't have much time myself to read blogs, so how can I think others do and will?  I have friends tell me they wish they had time to read it.  Many who do/might read it already know what's going on with us, and don't need the blog to keep them informed.  It's hard to keep going when you don't really know who your audience is or if you even have one.

Reason #2:
I can't keep up with it!  I am me, plus a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend, cousin, employee, etc. and I take those roles seriously.  There are soooo many demands on my time.  Add an international move every few years, and I have to prioritize.  When things fall by the wayside, as this blog has done, I still feel the pressure to keep up.  Why do it to myself?  There are so many things that have taken precedence over this blog over the past few months, so why keep up the pretense and pressure to be a blogger?

Reason #1:
I have no way of knowing who will come across this and how they may misconstrue it!  I never talk about work on this blog when in fact that is one of the most fascinating (and different) aspects of my life.  That's what people want to know more about, but I refuse to go there in writing and that too on the web.  For security and privacy reasons, I am only willing to delve so much into my family's happenings.  I do like to write about living abroad, and my perceptions of each place, and I have come to realize my personal thoughts about such matters could potentially be misconstrued and cause problems for both my organization and me.  Let's just say there was a major diplomatic kerfuffle recently, and it brought such possibilities to light in a way that I can't ignore.  I am not one to hide from social media completely, as it is the best way for me to keep up with my family and friends all over the world.  However, I do feel the need to use social media responsibly, and minimize my own presence on it, and I just can't have some ramblings on a blog entry come to haunt me. 

So there, I've said it: I am done blogging.*

*With all that said, life happens, and the only constant is change.  Never say never.  I may be back one day. 

Crop Over Craziness

My friend RZ beat me to blogging about the craziness that goes on during Crop Over (aka Carnival), and since she did such a great job, I'm going to send you to her blog entry and awesome 2 minute video.  It's not cheating... it's simply recognizing that someone else has it covered!  Now that you know what it's all about, let me tell you about my experience.  Waking up at 6 a.m. on Friday, going to work all day, then spending time with my little one (who did not understand or care that I would be up all night) meant that I went into Foreday Morning sans nap.  Good thing a friend was having a pre-party at her house starting at 10 p.m.  I think the last time I started a night out at that time was in college.  All day it rained and rained in Barbados, and I for one would have stayed home had it continued.  But, it stopped, and it was a beautiful, clear, cool night to party away in the streets.  I hit a block at about 4 a.m. (best guess) where I just couldn't shake my hips anymore but was okay walking.  I bought a snack of popcorn from a street vendor and kept on movin'.  We finished in the 5 o'clock hour, and I was home at 6 a.m. ready to CRASH.  In addition to the fun, I will always remember S pointing at me covered in various paint colors and learning "blue" and "green."  Once it was all washed off, for a few days I got to hear his sweet little voice saying, "Mommy, blue all gone.  Mommy, green all gone."  :)

Unlike RZ, I did not do the Breakfast Party.  It's not my intent to sound like an old lady, but I spent all of Sunday recovering from Foreday Morning and getting ready for Kadooment.  I was feeling pretty good and back to normal by 8 a.m. on Monday.  We started the parade with a drizzle, which turned into a beautiful day with a mix of sunshine, clouds, and more drizzle that was great to keep us all energized and moving.  I had fun.  Now that I've said that, let me elaborate.  I had fun, I'm glad I did it, and I fully believe that it completes my Barbados experience in a way that I had not anticipated.  However, I realized that I'm past all the partying and drinking too much and it was a little much to be surrounded by it all day.  That's all.  I didn't notice it as much during Foreday Morning... was it the darkness, the sleep deprivation...?  The first couple of days after it was over, I said I'm glad I did it once, but I would not do it again.  Now that a couple of weeks have passed, I find myself thinking I would do one of the two events (not both) if I were here during Crop Over again... There's just something special about the music, and letting go (especially after working so hard for so many weeks), and spending time with the friends I've made here that made it an experience I will never forget.  I only regret the things I didn't do...!

Dooflicky & Thanksgiving, 2011

I am starting to realize that holidays (local and U.S.) in this Foreign Service life serve as not only a countdown (how many more ____ holiday will I celebrate at this Post?), they are also an indicator of how settled you are in your current home.  Dooflicky is the name of the annual Barbadian Independence Day celebration held at the Embassy.  Last year it took place about two weeks after we arrived here.  While we had fun, it was definitely a blur of meeting new people, being introduced to Barbadian culture via its foods and music, and meeting the needs of our then 4 month old child.  This year, we were encouraging newcomers to attend because we knew what to expect and how much fun it was and wanted them to experience it too.  We had even more fun than last year and it was a social gathering of people we knew and with whom we spend time regularly.  Even S recognizes many of the faces at this point, and he had a good time dancing to the music and running around the courtyard. 

Thanksgiving also had a different feel in its second time here.  Due to our food preferences and allergies, M and I tend to have a low-key Thanksgiving celebration when left to our own devices... we tend to make Indian food, actually, and that's what we did last year!  We know so many more people now, and were appreciative of being included in a friend/neighbor's celebration.  We contributed a green bean casserole and had a lovely evening pigging out with new friends. 

These holidays also serve as a countdown though.  Last year, we knew we would be here for these events in 2011.  Now that November 2011 has come and gone, we don't really know whether we will be here next year for these same holidays.  Our departure date won't be set for some time to come, but we can't be certain whether it will be Nov 1 or Nov 30 or somewhere in between.  Going forward, we either have to go to the event/happening or forgo it entirely since we can't rely anymore on the fallback of "we'll go next year."

Reflecting on 2010

One year ago today, I was at the end of my first trimester of pregnancy, and we attended a New Year's Eve party with many of our closest friends in CLT. Three women, with whom I've been friends since we were 13-14 years old, were also expecting. Going through pregnancy and preparing for the arrival of our babies with 3 close friends was a unique and fun experience, to say the least! I was also "holding my breath" to successfully finish the process and be offered a position with the State Department. In March, I got the email I had been waiting for and accepted my dream job... I was going to be a Foreign Service Officer! M and I celebrated 7 years of marriage with a weekend trip to Wilmington, NC in April. Also in April, I resigned from my 8-year career in banking, and moved to the Washington, DC area in May to begin orientation and training for the new job. We enjoyed a couple of months of urban living (walking to nearby places to eat, taking the Metro, checking out historic sites) as much as one can in the heat of the summer and while 8-9 months pregnant! We welcomed our precious baby boy S in July, and spent the next 8 weeks in a sleepless blur of diapers and feedings. S was the last to arrive among his friends, the babies of my friends who were also expecting, as they were all born within 32 days of each other! Oh, and less than 1 week after S's birth, I celebrated my 30th birthday, if one can call remembering what day it was as celebrating! I returned to work (=more training) in September, and we moved to our first post of Bridgetown, Barbados in late October/early November. The last 2 months have been a mix of settling into our new home and catching our breath.

For both M and me, 2010 will be a year we will never forget. And here is hoping for a much calmer 2011!

June

Yet another month has flown by, and I want to take the time to reflect on its highlights. My parents hosted a baby shower for us in CLT on June 5. It was a very quick trip for us, but a nice one. We celebrated the pending arrival of our 1st child with many friends and family at the shower, and it was wonderful! Much of our family then went to dinner that night to celebrate my Uncle's recent 50th birthday, and we were glad to be a part of it. Can't take for granted anymore being there for such things since we're now a 6 hour drive away, and about to be an-at least-that-long of a flight away.

The following weekend, M's parents spent the day with us. My cousins who live nearby came by that evening, so it was a relaxing day of staying home while having a house full of people at the same time. I got some much needed 'me' and nap time the next day when M went to hang out at those same cousins' house. I passed on the principle that I am making myself stay home, or very close to home, for the rest of my pregnancy weekends. It's the only way I know to not do too much!

My parents and bro came to visit us the 3rd weekend of June. They're taking advantage of spending time with us while we're still close by, plus pampering me in "my delicate condition." We are really enjoying all this time with our family, being fully aware that these types of weekends are going to be few and far between in the future. The 3 of them and M went to see The White House (again, and from the outside) and then went up the tower of The Old Post Office. I was sad that I was unable to go but I simply cannot walk/stand that much these days, and I didn't want to prevent them from getting a bit of DC sightseeing time.

This last weekend of June is about getting ready for the baby! We're approx. 2 weeks away from the due date, and we better get it done. Aside from being tired and uncomfortable a lot, all is well with me and baby.

Two of my close friends in CLT had their babies in the past 2 weeks. It is quite unreal to think of them as mothers, having grown up with them so to speak since we were in 8th-9th grade! Wish we could be there to see their newest additions, but that won't happen until we have our own new addition and make a trip to CLT!

And for the sake of posterity, let me also mention that M has been watching the World Cup pretty much non-stop when we're at home! To his credit, he has been taking a 2 week course with me at the training center, so he has missed out on some of the live action, but he makes up for it in the evenings ;)

First assignment

I'm in my 5th and final week of orientation... I learned the location of my first assignment yesterday in a ceremony very appropriately known as Flag Day. We are going to Bridgetown, Barbados in November as my first 2-year assignment!!!! YES, you read that correctly... Barbados! It was definitely not expected, but certainly will be enjoyed :) Still waiting to find out certain details, but we now know the place and know the estimated timing of our departure from the U.S. In the interim, I will be in more training, and having baby/taking maternity leave.

On the baby front, had an OB appointment today and we are both doing well. I'll be going weekly from now on. We are busy with preparations for his arrival, and taking advantage of these last few weeks of just the 2 of us.

On the road...

On the road to VA and M's driving for a bit. In spite of his knee surgery a few days ago, there was no way he was going to let me drive the whole way, and I wasn't too keen on doing so anyway.

Our car is jam-packed!! AND we gave a few things to a friend to take back up for us (she lives near our new address, and is in town for a friend's party). Poor Merlin is sitting on a cooler because the back seat is completely full! This is the first move for M & me... clearly lots of lessons learned, but overall we did pretty well. Hopefully in the future, we do even better and with less stuff!

I didn't think moving/leaving had hit me until all of a sudden it did as I saw the locked front door and we were about to pull away. Both of our bros helped us a TON and it hit me as they were leaving (and right after I'd spoken to my parents) that we were leaving family and our life behind. I got all teary but thankfully I was driving and had to nip it in the bud.

Those emotions may still show up but for now, I'm cherishing feeling relieved at having our long to-do list behind us. I can now focus on the next thing, which is the "meet & greet" tomorrow and starting my new job on Monday!

Baby Shower I

My friends NW and TZ, and my cousin SD hosted a baby shower for me on Sat, May 1. It was held at Lava Bistro, and the weather was great for an afternoon with girlfriends on LB's outdoor patio. We ate some yummy food, shared stories and caught up, and laughed as Baby Mad Libs were read aloud. I also received lots of presents, helping us prepare for our baby boy's arrival. My Mom stopped by my house later that day, and commented on how happy and relaxed I looked. Of course I did, considering I'd been showered with love and well wishes all afternoon by some of my favorite people in the world!

Resignation

Technically, this is the 2nd time I have resigned from a job but it feels so much more momentous than the first that it might as well be my first. And the concept of people my age having multiple careers (and not just jobs) in a lifetime has some truth to it because I am about to embark on my third career, and this is before I turn 30. A friend put it well when she said that resigning is akin to jumping out of an airplane... you know you have a parachute (i.e. a job offer in hand) and you know it should work, but it's still a leap of faith. That is exactly what it felt like on the day I actually turned in my letter of resignation.

After nearly 8 years in banking, I am hanging up that hat to pursue what I consider the opportunity of a lifetime! I am going to be a Foreign Service Officer with the US Department of State starting in May. This means we "move" to the Washington DC area (Arlington, to be exact) in about 3 weeks to start my new job training, and then eventually get posted overseas! It's a not total move right now since we have a fully furnished corporate housing-type apartment up there. We have postponed the full move to a future date (TBD) since we have taken on enough for the time being. I am so excited, I can hardly wait to start!

Back to the resignation... it is definitely bittersweet. My current employer has been very good to me over the years in recognizing my talents and giving me growth opportunities. And, of course, the people! No one can argue that while jobs can be easy to leave behind, it's not so easy with (many of) the people. It's going to be difficult to say goodbye when that last day comes, and I hope that we will stay in touch, the way we all promise to do.

Mexico v. Iceland

A World Cup Exhibition (aka "friendly") match was held in Charlotte earlier this week between Mexico and Iceland. M is a huge fan of soccer (he used to play, wishes he still could) and since this was the closest we were going to get to the World Cup, of course we went! There were 8 of us (including my bro) and it was fun to go with a big group. I have now seen firsthand how crazy soccer fans really are... or I should clarify and say I have now seen how animated and enthusiastic fans of Mexico really are! We would have been hard-pressed to find a single fan of Iceland!

The game ended with a score of 0-0, which was disappointing. With it being an exhibition game, they did not go into overtime nor did they have a shoot-out (which we would have loved to see!). All in all, it was a great time, and I'm glad we did something new.

August travels, so far

A picture really is worth a thousand words... take a look at my pics from the past 2 wknds, and you'll get more of an idea of the fun times we had, first with family and then with friends, than I could ever try to explain here.

We spent the evening of August 7 and all of 8 in the Columbia, SC area (Lexington to be exact), visiting with family and celebrating the holiday of Raksha Bandhan. All of us present had not been together in quite a while, and it was a nice day full of food and laughter.

The weekend of Aug 13-16: M and I drove to Cincinnati, with our friends A&RS, to attend the wedding of our friends S&S. It was a wonderful 3 day celebration, with plenty of good food, good company and good times! Highlights from the festivities include: 1) the couple's first dance with song sung by the bride's father accompanied by guitar played by the groom's brother-in-law, 2) a photo booth from which the picture strip served as a memento for us, while the bride & groom got a copy of it in a scrapbook, 3) the bride being carried out like a princess by her uncles. Now we're recovering from 3 late nights, and not looking forward to unpacking!

Changing Places at LMNS

I went to the Opening Reception for the Changing Places exhibit at the Levine Museum of the New South today. I mentioned before that my wedding sari is on display as part of this exhibit, and now, there are also short video snippets of my "story" (answers to certain questions they ask). I went with my friend DW, and a coworker SM, and I talked them into recording the videos too! Who knows- you might see us on You Tube, on their PBS Special, etc. (at least that's what it said on the release you agree to when you do it). I've posted pictures from it on my Flickr page.

By the way, the exhibit is "a multipart, year-long project exploring how people in the Charlotte region are dealing with the growing cultural diversity and change created by the influx of newcomers from across the U.S. and around the globe." If you live in the area, or know others who do, go/tell them to check it out. It's unlike any museum exhibit you have likely seen in the past... it's a very visual, multi-media, touch-and-feel kind of thing.

A fun conference

This is the 3rd year that I am attending the NC Conference for Women, and I am really looking forward to it. While it may be a conference, and I will be there with some of the women from my work and our clients, it actually feels like a day of pampering. I feel very fortunate that I get to go to these types of things through my job. I have heard Lisa Ling speak before (at another Wachovia-sponsored women's event), and I am curious to hear what she has to say this time. I may also go listen to Alek Wek's story...

Correction

After posting about my previous New Year's Eves, I realized that I actually spent the one in '00 in India, with the same family with whom I spent the one in '07 (sans Michael in '00). It's amazing how these important memories get jumbled up. My parents and bro and I went to NYC to watch the fireworks over a July 4th weekend, in either '99 or '00 (can't recall). I am definitely going to start keeping better track of this stuff!

New Year's Eve

I like how there are built-in times when we can't help but reflect on the past and anticipate the future. New Year's Eve is one of these days, and on 12/31/08, I found myself thinking about where, as in actual location (not figuratively), I was on previous NYEs. Here is a brief listing:

pre-'99: typically at home watching Dick Clark, or in Uptown Charlotte at the old First Night celebrations.
'99: I flew home that evening from study-abroad + travels in Spain, and was asleep at midnight!
'00: I was in NYC, somewhere overlooking Hudson Bay, watching fireworks with parents and bro.
'01-'04: these years are a blur, and M can't recall either; were we out with friends in Uptown Charlotte or did we stay home?
'05: M & I were in NYC with cousins; we have fond memories of walking ~40+ blocks in 20 degree weather, going to see the tree and skaters at Rockefeller Center, walking by St Patrick's Cathedral, seeing the snowflakes light up on the Saks (?) building. Had a wonderful Italian meal at some little restaurant in the Village, and then ended up at some jazz club. We then had the best kati roll around 2 or 3a!
'06: we were in Miami/Ft. Lauderdale area to celebrate my recent MBA graduation.
'07: we were in India, at a party at my Uncle's house, surrounded by lots of family, & good food!
'08: we were in Charlotte, at friends' house and then out in Uptown with friends and cousins.

I'm a little sad that I can't remember where we were/what we did for a 4 year period. I'm realizing as I get older that while these memories are special at the time, I am fortunate enough to have lots of good ones and some of them got lost in the brain shuffle. I am trying to do a better job of capturing memories via pictures, writing in a journal or this blog, etc.

Election of my generation

Considering the title of my blog, how can I not write about this election, given the places it has taken me, and the moments I have had with it? I am quite the Democrat, so I was only considering one side of the choice. I was driving somewhere one day, many months ago, when I remember wondering who I would support - Obama or Clinton? The question that then immediately popped into my head was, "who inspired me more?" and the answer was clearly & easily Obama. That inspiration motivated me to:

1. Give him $ (not much, but I think it matters that I gave him any at all)
2. Volunteer 15+ hours to his campaign (phone banking, canvassing, checking on a precinct today)
3. Wait in line to attend 2 rallies (one of them was yesterday, in the rain!)
4. Talk to many colleagues and friends re: the importance of voting
   

I don't agree with everything he has said, done, or proposed. I don't know if my (small) contributions will make a difference. I don't know how this thing will end tonight. I don't know if I will be this involved (and more) in future campaigns. I do know that these past few weeks were 'a moment' in my lifetime that I will never forget, and about which I will cherish telling my kids and grandkids...

Chapel Hill

A few weeks ago, M and I and my bro (SS) decided to buy tix to a UNC football game. It had been years since I'd attended a game (since my time in school) and the team has been doing so well, we thought we'd make a day of it. That day was Sat 10/25, we were playing BC, and it was raining. I'm not enough of a sports fan-atic to sit through any game while getting wet, regardless of how I feel about the team. However, I'm too frugal to have spent $ on tix and then not go. Turned out our seats were high enough on the lower level that we were covered (by the upper level)! It was a good game, and we won!!

We then walked through campus to head to Franklin St. While I've been in the town of Chapel Hill over the years (typically when visiting NW in Durham), I hadn't been on campus, and my has it changed a lot! There are new buildings everywhere! It was strange walking around; so much was familiar and yet it was so different. I'm glad we got to get away for a day to one of my favorite places. But I realized that to truly enjoy it, I need more time when there, and less time between visits!

SC Business Week - Day 6

I started the day feeling more refreshed; not sure why since I'm still sleep-deprived. Helped the students finish up Quarter 6 on their simulation. Unfortunately, we dropped to #2 in Quarter 5, and then ended the game at #3. It's okay though because they learned a lot, and I think I learned a lot about providing guidance.

The evening activity was a banquet followed by a dance. Thursday nights at Business Week are always the craziest due to the dance, and it being the students' final night away from home! We had a bit of drama last night, but nothing I want to post on this. It's Friday now, and I have finished up with the classroom portion. I will see my students 1 more time at the graduation assembly, and then we all head home to crash!

Woke up yesterday at 7a, took a 30 min nap, and went to bed around 1:45a.

SC Business Week - Day 5

Woke up an hour earlier to go on a plant tour of Fuji Film in Greenwood, SC. Cool tour as most everything was automated to make their disposable cameras. They handed each of us a camera as we left, which was impressive considering there are 200 of us!

Held a Talent Show for the students and there were about 25 acts... They were mostly good and we had a lot of fun!! There are football camps here, and it is challenging for us to make sure our girls stay away from those boys, and that they all get to/stay in their own dorms! That's part of what makes our nights so late.

Woke up @ 6a, took 2 naps of 30 min each, and went to bed @ 1:15a.

SC Business Week - Day 4

My company is still leading the simulation at the end of Quarter 4! They have come together nicely for a team banner and cheer they had to prepare to present in front of 12 other teams. They didn't win either, nor have they won any other little competitions we have held, but I figure the best "revenge" would be to win the simulation :) Only 2 more quarters to go...

We held Business Week Olympics tonight for the students, with relay races, and that was fun. Later, while hanging out with other CAs, I mastered the hula hoop! Given that this is only the 2nd time I have hula hooped (not a word, but how do you convey that?!), and the first time was at Business Week last year, I'm impressed.

Woke up at 7a, took a 25 min nap, and went to bed at 1a. Couldn't do without a nap today as I'm getting more and more worn out.